The annual joke contest is back and we have winners!

woo hoo!

SERIOUSLY, NO TEASING.

A few (million) years ago the Snooze ran the critically acclaimed hamburger joke contest. Those who subscribed in 1994 (see Volume 1, Issue 23) know that it is a very competitive joke contest. You will remember that the prize was a Plopp bar from Sweden and there were three entries and three winners. This year, there were more entries and prizes.

The topic was tea. Regular drinking tea, and it incuded tea pots, tea bags, tea cozies, tea leaves or anything else to do with tea. The prize was tub of chocolates from Trader Joes or, if you wanted instead, a bag of pignoli nuts.

Here are the sample tea jokes.

What does a teapot say to it's lover?
O, dajarling!

Who is the teapot's favorite actress?
Tea Leoni.

Why did the tea bag have to do it's laundry?
Because it was stained.

What is a baby teapots favorite game?
Pekoe-boo.

Without further ado
the Snooze presents
the much awaited award-winning
Tea Jokes

Why was the cow teapot late to the party?
Because she was decafinated!
Holly Douglas-Fleury
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

How long does it take to ship tea from China by slow boat?
Oolong Time!
Mensch Freborg
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

What does a teapot say to her hairdresser?
Don't teas
Theresa Rubino
Wins my company!

What does the teapot say to its bag?
I don't want another seep out of you!
Teary
Wins my company!

What kind of music do teapots like?
Jasmine
Theresa
Wins my company!

Why did the teapot wear a cozy?
Cozy kept him warm.
Kitten
Honorable mention

Why must you be careful of tea at night?
Because it might mug you.
Louellin Prysbe
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

What does a tea bag do when it's tired?
It seeps.
Jules Strand
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

What do lady teapots like to wear?
String of Earls!
Lucy Smites
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

What's a teapots favorite folk tune?
My Dajarling Clementine
Ted Lampert
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

Why did the teapot get in trouble?
Because he was naughtea.
Rachel Milistein
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

What did the teapot wear to bed?
A nightea
Rachel Millstein
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

Why did the tea get away?
Because it was loose.
Vex Ampet
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

What does the tea do when it moves to LA?
It has its bags removed.
Nancy Prescott
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

How does a tea bag seep?
On its side
Gloria Dover
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

What's the teapots favorite movie?
E.T.
Bob Granket
Wins Pignoli Nuts!

X-rated Tea jokes--Beware!

What's under old ladies teacozy?
Tea-pends.

What happens when old lady teapot laughs too hard?
She teas her pants.

What's under baby teapot's cozy?
Plastic panteas.

What is under Mr. Teapot's cozy?
His box earls?
No, really. What is under his cozy?
His tea string?
No really, what?
His teaniss.
Oh My!

Theresa takes total responsibility for this x-rated line of teapot jokes.
AND
She wins Pignoli Nuts!

IN Memorium: Hamburger Joke Winners, 1994

Where does the hamburger go to find a doctor?
Mayo Clinic!

Why did he go?
Because he had a bunion!
Plopp bar went to Calla.

What is the difference between OJ Simpson and a hamburger?
A hamburger's got a pickle in it and OJ Simpson's in a pickle.
Plopp bar went to mom, who also received an honorable mention.

Do you think these tea jokes are dorky?

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Copyright January 1999 Catherine L. Rubino.

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